The teenage years can be extremely stressful, and that stress can compound if you’re part of the LGBTQ+ community. LGBTQ+ teens are more likely to face factors like rejection, bullying, discrimination, and violence, which can greatly impact their mental health. This can lead to higher rates of anxiety and depression, substance abuse, and suicidal ideation and behaviours. But there’s good news. Having unconditional love and support at home is one of the biggest factors for the general health of LGBTQ+ teens. If you’re a parent or caregiver, here’s how to support the mental health of LGBTQ+ teens and why it’s so important.
LGBTQ+ 101
LGBTQ+ is an acronym used to refer to non-heterosexual and/or non-cisgender individuals, topics, and communities. It stands for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer/questioning, and the ‘+’ holds space for the ever-expanding understanding of gender and sexual identities. LGBTQ+ is used to bring together the many different sexual and gender identities that are marginalized in society.
4 Mental Health Struggles of LGBTQ+ Teens
LGBTQ+ teens are more likely to face factors like rejection, bullying, discrimination, and violence. This can seriously impact their mental health, leading to issues like depression, anxiety, and substance abuse. The stress of being LGBTQ+ is a risk factor in itself, due to being in such a marginalized and misunderstood group. They may feel the need to conceal their identities due to fear of being rejected, or fear that they’ll be harassed or bullied.
They may also not have fully come to terms with their identity, which can lead to confusion and anxiety. Being addressed by the wrong name or pronouns is a risk factor for mental health struggles as well. It’s important to understand that the mental health struggles LGBTQ+ persons face are not due to their gender identity or sexual orientation, but rather how they’re mistreated and stigmatized in society. Here are 4 common mental health struggles or LGBTQ+ teens:
- Stress and anxiety
- Depression
- Substance abuse and addiction
- Suicidal ideation and attempts
How to Support the Mental Health of LGBTQ+ Teens
1. Provide Unconditional Love and Support at Home
It’s been shown time and time again that having unconditional love and support at home is one of the biggest health and safety factors for LGBTQ+ youth. It can boost their self-esteem and general wellbeing, as well as lead to less depression, substance abuse, and suicidal thoughts and behaviours. It also allows you to have a closer relationship with your teen. Things you can do to show your support include talking to them respectfully about their identity, welcoming their LGBTQ+ friends and partners, using their names and pronouns correctly, and educating yourself about LGBTQ+ people and issues..
2. Encourage Open Conversation
It’s important that your teen feels like home is a safe place to be themselves without fear of judgment or rejection. Regular, non-stressful conversations will help normalize their feelings and experiences. Make sure you’re asking questions about your teen’s friends and daily life and model open communication by regularly sharing your own feelings. Create an environment where your teen feels they can come to you with any questions or concerns they have, and always be mindful of using gender and romantic stereotypes.
3. Advocate for Them at School
Lack of support from teachers and school administration is a huge safety and mental health risk for LGBTQ+ youth. There are a number of things you can do to advocate for your teen at school. The first step is to assess where the school is in their LGBTQ+ inclusion work. Are they aware of other LGBTQ+ families? Do they have training on how to support LGBTQ+ students? How do they handle comments like “that’s so gay” and other LGBTQ+ slurs? If the school’s forms and paperwork doesn’t include space to provide their pronouns or only includes “male” and female” as genders, work for them to be updated. You can also volunteer at the school by joining the PTA or diversity committee if they have one.
4. Help Them Find Mental Health Care
Check in with your teen to see if they’re interested in mental health care. This could include different types of therapy (affirmative therapy, cognitive behaviour therapy), support groups, and mindfulness based stress reduction (MBSR). According to a 2022 survey done by The Trevor Project, among all LGBTQ+ youth, 82% wanted mental health care, but 60% of the youth who wanted it were not able to get it due to factors such as concerns over obtaining parental permission, fear of discussing mental health concerns, and fear of being outed. Let your teen know that you support them in their mental health journey and will assist them in finding the right care.
5. Connect Them to Vetted Healthcare Providers
Part of connecting your teen with good health care for their physical and mental health is making sure that your teen’s health care providers respect their sexual orientation and gender identity. Ask your teen if they’re more comfortable seeing a certain gender for their healthcare needs. You’ll also want to look into the healthcare providers themselves to ensure they provide culturally competent care to LGBTQ+ persons. This would include using the right terminology to address clients and peers, staying up to date on LGBTQ+ health concerns, and not asking questions or making statements based on the assumption that the patient is heterosexual and cisgender. For example, asking “do you have a boyfriend” to all female-appearing patients.
6. Consider a Parent Support Group
Joining a support group can help you understand your teen better. You’ll be connected with other parents who share similar experiences to you and can learn how to become a stronger ally for your LGBTQ+ teen. You’ll feel less alone and more equipped to support your child, especially if your teen is going through mental health struggles.
If you’re the parent of an LGBTQ+ teen, providing love and support is one of the best things you can do for their overall health. Use these tips to ensure your teen is getting the support they need.
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