Do you suffer from low self-esteem? Do you struggle to love your body? Do you want to know how to be a positive role model to the children in your life and teach them that beauty comes from within? If you want to know how to be more confident in yourself, this post is for you!
Confidence allows you to do what makes you happy, and gives you the ability to say ‘yes’ and ‘no’ when you want to. It empowers you to stand up for yourself, as well as aim high and take on a new idea when it hits you! Confident people aren’t scared to say how they feel, and they believe in their skills, goals and ability to succeed.
How to Be More Confident: 9 Tips that Work
1) Always put your best foot forward
If you want to know how to be more confident, one of the first things I suggest you do is consider how you present yourself to the world. I truly believe that our appearance plays a huge role in how we feel about ourselves and our bodies, which in turn impacts how we interact with others. Some may take me to task on this, and tell me I’m shallow for feeling that hair, makeup, and fashion play a role in our self-esteem, and that’s fine. But I know from experience that I feel much more confident in myself when I’m rocking a flattering outfit and I’ve taken the time to apply makeup and fix my hair.
If you’re looking for fashion tips and tricks to help you feel more confident in yourself and your body, we’ve written an entire post on this topic, which you can read HERE.
2) Learn to love yourself
Have you ever heard of Ashlie Molstad? She’s on a mission to teach women how to see their own self-worth, and her message is refreshing and inspiring. So many of us struggle to love ourselves because we think we need to look a certain way, and I love how brutally honest Ashlie cuts through all that noise as she helps women see that the number on the bathroom scale has zero bearing on who they are as people. She teaches women to stop hating their bodies – to stop punishing themselves for the foods they ate and the workouts they skipped – and reminds them what’s truly important in life.
If you want to know how to be more confident, I highly recommend following Ashlie on Instagram!
3) Embrace imperfection and persevere through challenges
There are so many cliches floating around social media aimed at reminding us that perfection doesn’t exist. You’ve probably seen memes with quotes like, ‘Progress not perfection!’, ‘Focus on the journey not the destination!’, ‘Imperfection is beautiful!’, and ‘Perfectly imperfect!’, on your Instagram feed, and while the logical part of our brains know all of these sentiments are 100% true, it’s a mindset shift many of us struggle with. And that’s such a shame.
The problem with striving for perfection is that it holds us back from taking risks, and when we do put ourselves out there and fail, it does nothing but perpetuate our internal negative self-talk. Instead, you must train your brain to view setbacks as learning opportunities that help you grow, develop, and move forward. And when roadblocks get in your way, stop saying, ‘I can’t’ and start saying, ‘I can’t…YET.’
4) Stop comparing yourself to others
One of my least favorite parts of social media is that it is extremely one-sided as most of us only share the positive parts of our lives on our Facebook and Instagram pages. Rather than sharing all of our insecurities, we use photoshop and filters to fool the world into thinking we’re perfect. And while there’s something to be said about focusing on the good instead of the bad, this unrealistic portrayal of perfection leaves many of us feeling inadequate. My suggestion? Ignore it. We all have our own unique strengths and weaknesses, and instead of competing with strangers on the internet, compete with yourself instead.
5) Fight negativity with positivity
Another great tip to try if you want to know how to be confident is to get into the habit of challenging every negative thought you have about yourself with 3 positive ones. This can seem silly and even a bit tedious, but you will eventually train your brain to focus on the positives instead of the negatives, which can have a profound impact on your internal dialogue. Make sure you write these thoughts out on paper – or store them in the notes app on your smartphone – so that the thoughts stick.
6) Educate and empower yourself
If you struggle with self-confidence due to a fear of failure, educate and empower yourself! Take courses, read self-help books, find a mentor, hire a trainer, and do whatever else it is you need to do to remove those barriers and roadblocks. Remind yourself that in order to be good at something, you have to suck at it first, and resist the urge to give in when things feel too difficult. Your hard work and determination will pay off, and your confidence will get a nice boost along the way.
7) Focus on solutions instead of problems
Another powerful tip for those who want to know how to be confident is to proactively look for solutions when difficulties arise. Instead of focusing on the negatives and wallowing in self-pity, take action. Channel all of your negativity into turning the situation around so you feel more in control.
8) Surround yourself with confident people
I’m a firm believer that our lives are a direct result of the people we surround ourselves with, and if you struggle with self-confidence, try to avoid interactions that are likely to perpetuate those feelings. Does this mean you need to cut the people you love out of your life forever? Absolutely not! Just be mindful about how these people make you feel and make a concerted effort not to allow their negative energy to take residence in your mind and spirit.
I find it helpful to engage in something positive after interacting with negative people, like going for a walk with some upbeat tunes, watching my favorite TV show, spending time connecting with my husband and daughter, or writing out a list of 5 things I’m grateful for. Once those initial emotions have simmered down, I spend some time brainstorming WHY someone I love and care for tried to tear me down. More often than not, it’s because they feel insecure about themselves, and while that doesn’t excuse their hurtful comments and behavior, it helps remind me that their negativity has nothing to do with me and everything to do with them so I can move forward.
9) Fake it ’til you make it
My last tip for those who want to know how to be confident is to fake it. Instead of walking around with slumped shoulders, tense muscles, and a frown on your face, stand up tall and smile. You will be amazed at how much differently the world reacts to you when you give off an air of confidence, and you may end up shifting your own perceptions about yourself and your abilities in the process!
I hope these tips and ideas help you in your quest to learn how to be more confident in yourself. Remember to believe in yourself, to embrace imperfection, to persevere in the face of adversity, to educate and empower yourself, and to fight negativity with positivity. Focus on solutions instead of problems, and surround yourself with people who lift you up instead of those who are determined to tear you down. Never be afraid to be your true self, because you are enough…just as you are!
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