Narcissism has become somewhat of a buzzword, often used to describe people who are full of themselves and don’t care about others’ feelings. While this is partly true, there’s more that goes into it, and there’s a difference between a true narcissist and someone who has narcissistic tendencies. If you’re wondering the traits of narcissistic women, we’ve compiled 13 of their most common characteristics, plus tips for dealing with them.
What Is a Narcissist?
The word narcissist gets thrown around a lot to describe someone who is self-absorbed or has an inflated ego. However, a true narcissist has narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), which is a mental health condition. It’s important to know that there’s a difference between someone diagnosed with NPD and someone with narcissistic traits.
People with narcissistic personality disorder are in love with an idealized, grandiose image of themselves, mostly because it allows them to avoid deep feelings of insecurity. While they may seem confident to the outside world, they’re often very self-conscious and insecure.
Narcissistic personality disorder involves a pattern of self-centred thinking and behaviour, a lack of empathy or consideration for others, and an excessive need for attention and adoration. Narcissists are extremely resistant to changing their behaviour, which often leads to instability in their work, life, and relationships. They exhibit selfishness at the expense of others as well as the inability to consider others’ feelings at all.
How Do Female Narcissists Differ From Male Narcissists?
Narcissism is more common in men than it is in women, and while the core characteristics of narcissism are generally similar, there are some differences in how these traits manifest in men versus women. Narcissistic traits seem to be fewer in women and less severe than they are in men. Narcissistic men tend to display more overtly aggressive and domineering behaviour, while narcissistic women often use covert tactics like manipulation, guilt-tripping, or gaslighting.
Female narcissists are less entitled, impulsive, aggressive, and more empathetic than narcissistic males. Female narcissists are often more emotional than their male counterparts, which makes them more likely to be sensitive and reactive. They’re more likely to be preoccupied with their appearance and material items than men are, and are also more prone to envy and jealousy.
13 Traits Of Narcissistic Women
- They’re self-centred or self-involved
- They have a preoccupation with their appearance, and are obsessed with vanity
- They’re prone to envy and jealousy
- They love to play the victim card
- They have passive aggressive and manipulative tendencies
- They lack accountability and always blame other people or situations for their problems
- They’re petty and are often hyper-focused on getting revenge
- They have an obsession with social status
- They thrive off being a “mean girl” – gossiping, spreading rumours, gaslighting, or giving people the cold shoulder
- They’re shallow or superficial- overly materialistic, preoccupied with brand name or luxury items
- They exploit other people for their own self-serving interests
- They show an inability to handle criticism – become moody and emotional or shut down when upset
- They’re needy and dependent in their relationships and have a lack of deep relationships
5 Tips for Dealing with Narcissistic Women
1. Change Your Expectations
When dealing with a narcissist, it’s not likely that she’s going to change, so you have to be the one to make changes and that starts with your expectations. Narcissists are often incapable of being emotionally mature, genuine, and selfless. This leads to them constantly letting down, disappointing, and blindsiding the people in their life. Keeping your expectations realistic will help you avoid being let down by her time and time again.
2. Don’t Engage In Her Drama
Narcissistic women thrive off of drama and will usually try to bring you into it. Refuse to engage or get pulled into their emotional manipulation. Try to stay calm and don’t let their behaviour affect you. Develop strategies to disengage quickly when the drama begins, which could include changing the subject or removing yourself from the situation.
3. Create Distance and Limit Your Interactions
Creating distance is one of the best things you can do when dealing with a narcissist. When you feel her narcissistic tendencies coming through, don’t be afraid to take some time away from her and limit your interactions. This can prevent you from getting too close or becoming a target of her drama. If you feel like you’re becoming a target, she’s gaslighting you, or bullying you, take time to yourself and focus on people and activities that make you happy.
4. Don’t Take Her Behaviour Personally
If a narcissist is treating you poorly, know that it has everything to do with her insecurities and nothing to do with you. Try your best not to take her behaviour personally or let it affect your sense of self-worth. If you’re someone who is sensitive to narcissistic behaviours, work on building your self-esteem and resilience. This could include going to therapy, exercising, or engaging in activities that reinforce your sense of self worth.
5. Set Boundaries and Don’t Enable Her
Enabling narcissistic behaviours, such as bullying or talking behind someone’s back, will only make the narcissism worse. Be sure to set clear boundaries, stay firm, and don’t give into their demands. This means not allowing them to manipulate or control you and standing up for yourself when needed. Make it clear what behaviour is acceptable and what is not, as well as the consequences for crossing those boundaries. By doing this, you can protect yourself and maintain a healthy relationship dynamic.
Narcissistic women are tricky to deal with. If you still want to keep them in your life, it’s important you set boundaries and learn how to deal with them.
This post contains affiliate links.
Did you find this post on the traits of narcissistic women helpful? We’d love it if you shared it on Pinterest!
Looking for more posts on how to deal with female friendships? Make sure to follow our All Things Women Board on Pinterest!
