Having any type of relationship (romantic, sibling, friendship) with a narcissist can be difficult. It can affect your mental health and well being, and in some cases, can even turn physical. Learning about narcissistic traits and how to deal with them can help you handle a narcissist in a healthy way, while also looking after yourself. Here are 12 traits of narcissistic men and how to deal with them.
What Is a Narcissist?
While the word narcissist is thrown around a lot, it’s important to recognize that there’s a difference between displaying narcissistic tendencies now and again, and having narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). In people diagnosed with NPD, traits are more severe, occur across different situations and environments, and impact relationships, often to the point of ruin.
People with narcissistic personality disorder have a grandiose, inflated image of themselves. NPD involves a pattern of self-centred thinking and behaviour, a lack of empathy or consideration for others, and an excessive need for attention and adoration. Narcissists are extremely resistant to changing their behaviour, which often leads to instability in their work, life, and relationships. They exhibit selfishness at the expense of others as well as the inability to consider others’ feelings at all.
How Do Male Narcissists Differ From Female Narcissists?
Male and female narcissists share core traits like grandiosity, entitlement, and lack of empathy. Male narcissists are typically more overtly aggressive, while female narcissists are more passive aggressive and often withhold love and attention. Men tend to demonstrate more entitlement than women, whether it’s entitlement to a career, romantic partner, sex, money, or other people’s time and energy. They commonly need to be in control of those around them, whether at work or in their relationships. In a romantic relationship, narcissistic men often want to control how their partner shows up in the world as well as how others view them. They may shame their partner for how they dress, what kind of profession they have, how much they weigh, etc.
12 Traits Of Narcissistic Men
- Inflated sense of self importance, feeling superior to others
- Lack of empathy
- Displaying aggressive behaviours
- Strong desire for power and success
- Control issues
- Commitment issues
- Pathological lying
- Requires excessive admiration
- Manipulation and gaslighting behaviours
- Love bombing- the use of excessive flattery, gift-giving, affection, and abundance of their time in the beginning of a relationship with the intent to make you feel dependent on them
- Abusive (physical, verbal, emotional, sexual, psychological)
- Little to no long-term friends or meaningful relationships
5 Tips for Dealing with Narcissistic Men
1. Establish Healthy Boundaries
Setting boundaries is key when you’re dealing with a narcissist. Someone with NPD can have a serious effect on your mental and emotional health. Letting him know the behaviours you will and will not tolerate can help your relationship and how you feel in it. And make sure to follow through on any consequences. For example, you may tell your brother that you won’t tolerate him arguing with you in an aggressive manner. If he continues to engage in that type of behaviour, you can distance yourself from him.
2. Foster Other Relationships
Whether you’re in a romantic relationship or friendship with a narcissist, make sure to nurture your outside relationships. Narcissists will often attempt to isolate their partners or friends. In a romantic relationship, he may try to cut you off from your friends and family to ensure your focus remains on him and that they can’t sway your opinion of him. This is also done to force you to rely on him and can be done in friendships as well. Stay in constant touch with other friends and loved ones and continue to foster healthy relationships and build your support system.
3. Look Out for Love Bombing
If you’re starting to talk to a potential romantic partner and think he may be love bombing you, don’t let it slide. Love bombing often looks like over communicating, lavish gifts, excessive neediness, and intense and quick bonding. They’ll put you on a pedestal in the beginning and then mistreat you. Love bombing is a manipulation tactic and is a form of emotional abuse. It’s often done at the beginning of a relationship to try to win someone over, but can also be used further into the relationship if you’ve distanced yourself from them. Engaging in love bombing can reinforce the behaviour and lead to further manipulation.
4. Avoid Arguing
In an argument with a narcissist, you’ll never win. They love to be perceived as intelligent and will pretty much do anything to get their way, which leads them to constantly persuade others that they’re right. It’s a way to assert himself and make himself feel important. Try to avoid arguing with him, and if you do, try to remain calm and empathetic. Matching his aggression can exacerbate the situation and lead to him becoming agitated and hostile. Distance yourself from the situation if this occurs.
5. Understand When It’s Time to Move On
Ending a relationship is never easy, but if he’s displaying narcissistic tendencies, you may be better off on your own. It’s best to leave a relationship if it’s affecting your mental or physical health; you’re being controlled, manipulated or isolated; or you’re being emotionally or physically abused. While narcissists are good at making promises that they’ll change, they usually won’t unless they get professional help. If your relationship has become unhealthy, it’s probably time to walk away.
Dealing with narcissistic men is extremely challenging. It’s important to set healthy boundaries, foster other relationships, and know when it’s time to walk away.
This post contains affiliate links.
Did you find this post on traits of narcissistic men helpful? We’d appreciate it if you shared this post on Pinterest!
Looking for more tips and advice for dealing with men? Make sure to follow our All Things Women Board on Pinterest!
